


This I Promise You

by justrae2010



Series: Victuuri Wedding Series - Here in Your Arms [3]
Category: Yuri!!! on Ice (Anime)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-08
Updated: 2017-08-08
Packaged: 2018-12-12 20:49:41
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,033
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11744919
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/justrae2010/pseuds/justrae2010
Summary: “We’re writing our own vows, right Yuuri?”Those few words were nothing short of Yuuri’s worst fears incarnate.





	This I Promise You

**Author's Note:**

> YOI Wedding Week Day 3
> 
> Prompt: Vows

**_Five months to go…_ **

“We’re writing our own vows, right Yuuri?”

Victor had popped the question up one quiet night in the apartment – one of the few nights they had off from studious wedding planning actually. Victor lay reclined on the couch watching a Russian movie on the TV while Yuuri sat with Victor’s legs draped over his lap, playing on his game so intensely it was like it was the only thing in the world that existed.

Until Victor asked the question, breaking through Yuuri’s bubble of concentration. A frown pinched into his brow, blinking up from his game.

“You want to?”

The uncertain edge to his voice gave away his otherwise passive expression, forcing his brow smooth after a moment and darting his eyes back down to the game again before Victor could see them overthinking. He could feel it already starting, blinking down at the game screen that was barely more than a blur while his ears pricked for Victor’s reply.

The couch squeaked as Victor turned his head. “I thought it would be romantic.”

Yuuri fought the urge to gulp. 

He hadn't thought about vows much. Mainly because he had hoped that the less he talked about it the more inclined Victor might be to just settle for simple, traditional vows. The idea of writing his own, when he was so verbally incompetent … 

He wasn't like Victor. He wasn't perfect with words like Victor was with years of experience with public speaking with the press. Yuuri was a mumbler; shy, and quiet, and private. Victor was eloquent and suave, confident in his own array emotions and in sharing them. Writing vows would be effortless for Victor. For Yuuri, it would be an entirely different ballgame. 

A measured breath sucked subtly through Yuuri's teeth, trying to ignore the fight between his heart and his ribcage. It was his worst nightmare. He did not want to write his own vows. 

But he could feel Victor's bright blue eyes watching him, feel their eager glow…

“Okay.”

 

* * *

 

**_Three months to go…_ **

Yuuri stared at the blank piece of paper looking up at him from the coffee table, pen hovering in his hand and teeth caught on his lower lip. 

He was stumped. 

Beyond stumped.

His mind ran a blank, completely devoid of words in all English, Japanese and Russian that might even begin to describe what he felt for Victor, what he wanted to promise for the rest of his life. But he had nothing. Absolutely nothing. He felt it in the warm glow in his chest, in the skip of his heartbeat whenever he looked at Victor, in the feeling of utter contentment when he held Victor in his arms, feeling their heartbeats pound between them so tight it was impossible to tell who it belonged to…

But how could he put that into words? 

How could he use a certain sequence of letters in a certain pattern, with a space for breath in between every odd one, to promise his soul to Victor Nikiforov for the rest of his natural life? It seemed so simple, yet so complicated. Impossible.

He’d scoured the internet on his laptop from the moment Victor had stepped out of the apartment to take Makkachin for his walk, searching for templates, help and tips from every article adorning the world wide web. It had been the worst decision he could have made. Now, he was even more confused. He’d seen long examples, short examples, examples with simple promises, and examples with elaborate romantic declarations that made hearts melt…

How long did vows need to be? Was there certain things he  _ needed _ to say around the personal bits he put in of his own? Should he go straight into the promises or tell of his and Victor’s love story first, setting the scene? 

He’d never thought about it before until Victor had asked that accursed question a few months ago to write their own vows. And for some mad reason, Yuuri had agreed.

_ What a mistake... _

The pen clattered down onto the coffee table as he groaned, leaning back in the couch until his eyes stared wide up at the ceiling. Air whistled through his teeth, raking his hands through his hair and wincing when they tugged through the knots lurking there. He tried to focus on the pain - more than the runaway freight train beat of his heartbeat at least. He had to stay calm. He wouldn’t be able to get a word out at all if he panicked. 

He’d hoped that some peace and quiet while Victor and Makkachin were out would help. He’d thought that left alone with his own thoughts, he’d find the right words - the perfect words - to make his wedding day flawless, to make Victor tear up with love…

So far, it wasn’t working.

His leg bounced anxiously and Yuuri tried to concentrate on the ache building in his thigh instead of the distressingly empty expanse of his mind. What was he going to do?

Another groan muffled into his sweater sleeves.

 

* * *

 

 

**_One month to go…_ **

Vaguely, Yuuri could hear Victor talking across the couch from him but he couldn’t hear the words, tuning him out unintentionally while the same thought rolled over and over inside his own head yet again.  _ Vows … vows… vows… _

The scratch of a pencil over paper flickered through his coma every now and then, his fiancee scribbling something in his notepad beside him. He couldn’t see what it was; Victor was braced with his back against the armrest, knees drawn up and feet tucked cosily under Yuuri’s thighs for warmth, bright eyes sparkling up over the top of his notepad every now and then. He looked adorable, like an excited little kid.

When his teeth caught on his lower lip though - stifling his far from subtle smirk - Yuuri couldn’t help it anymore.

“What are you writing?” he frowned.

Behind the notepad, Victor didn’t look up, a secretive smirk playing on his lips as he scribbled something else down. “Just stuff for the wedding.” He shrugged.

Yuuri’s eyes lingered on the pencil, drinking in the pattern it marked into the paper. The strokes were short and sharp - too hard to be anything but writing. Definitely writing. And it didn’t look like English, more like Cyrillic. Yuuri couldn’t read Cyrillic.

The way Victor’s eyes sparkled up over the page every now and then - glittering with something warm that made Yuuri’s heart flutter behind his ribcage - he realised he didn’t really need to. It hit him like a slap in the face as he realised, feeling warmth creep across his cheeks. Suddenly, Yuuri knew exactly what Victor was working on.

His breath caught. “... do you mean vows?”

Victor’s lips pressed together, eyes sparkling at the page. “Maybe.”

There was a pause.

“Let me see.”

Yuuri couldn’t help it; he twisted in his seat and drew his legs up beneath him, hands resting on Victor’s calves as he leaned forward. Blood pulsed loudly in his ears, heart pounding as he glimpsed the long lines of unmistakeable Russian Cyrillic adorning the front page of Victor’s note pad. There was no mad rush of words or brutal crossings out like in Yuuri’s vow workings; every word was written carefully, deliberately - there to stay. And there certainly was a lot of them….

The moment Yuuri clapped eyes on the front page though Victor whipped it away again, flatting the notebook flat against his chest. His gaze shot up to Yuuri. “No!”

It didn’t matter. Even if Yuuri sat there for a lifetime, he would probably still never be able to translate the page, would never know what Victor was planning until it was too late and they were both at the altar, where Yuuri would have to somehow match whatever Victor was scrawling out as he thought. The pout pushed on Yuuri lips regardless though, fluttering his eyelashes in the way he knew Victor couldn’t resist. He still wanted to see.

“Victor, please...”

The telltale blush dusted over Victor’s cheeks and Yuuri smirked in his head, watching Victor’s resolve start to visibly crumble behind his bright blue eyes. 

A groan rumbled deep in Victor’s chest, clinging to the last of his will. 

“But I want to save them - Yuuri!”

The notebook flung in the air over Victor’s head - just in time to avoid Yuuri’s darting fingers. He pushed forward suddenly, clamoring over Victor to reach it. Strong arms secured around his waist though, holding him tight in Victor’s lap as the notebook splatted down on the floor a good few feet out of his reach. Yuuri watched it fall with a matching heart, wriggling his hips to try and free them.

Victor’s hold was unrelenting though, surprisingly strong for his lean figure. “Why?” the Russian grinned up at him, hair mussed up over his eye. “Are you stuck?”

Yuuri froze, eyes suddenly shooting wide.

“N-no.”

Heat flared over his face as he stammered, knees braced either side of Victor’s hips. He suddenly noticed just how intimate their position was, clambering back out of Victor’s lap clumsily.

“I just really wanted to see.” he covered, avoiding Victor’s eye as he curled up in a ball across the couch, knees pulled up to his chest.

His heart was in overdrive, chest impossibly tight as the lie spilled from his mouth. He had to say it though - he could hardly admit to Victor he hadn’t been able to write  _ any _ vows yet. It was like saying he didn’t have any inspiration for the wedding, like it didn’t matter, like he didn’t love Victor and couldn’t summon the energy to find any words for them. Like he didn't want to get married. 

No, he definitely couldn’t tell Victor. Shame burned red down the back of his neck, but he ignored it along with the sear of Victor’s gaze scouring over him. It lingered just a second longer than Yuuri wanted it to. He tried to ignore it.

Just like he tried to ignore counting the number of pages as Victor flicked through his work, pressure mounting second by second.

 

* * *

 

 

**_Two weeks to go…_ **

It was too late.

Air wheezed in and out of Yuuri’s lungs in short, sharp bursts as he sat curled up against the edge of the bed in his and Victor’s bedroom, hands clamped down either side of his skull. Thoughts were exploding behind his eyes, bursting overwhelmingly like fireworks, but of them were the right ones. None of them were vow material.

He had two weeks left. If he hadn’t been able to come up with anything by then, would he ever? He’d had months that he’d whittled away! Victor was ready, but Yuuri still had nothing...

How was he going to marry Victor without any vows?

He was glad Victor was out. Doing what, he couldn’t remember but he was glad in that moment that all there was to focus on in the apartment was the sound of his own wheezing breaths and the dull crunch as Makkachin chewed on his phone in the next room. In the back of his head, Yuuri knew he should stop him. He didn’t. He didn’t move. He just let the tears flow, let his lip quiver, and let his ribs screw tighter and tighter around his lungs. 

He flinched when music exploded from the next room suddenly. Makkachin must have broken into his music library by accident. It wasn’t helping. His fast breaths came in time with the hard Japanese rock song, wild drumbeat matching the heavy thump of his heart. He doubled over at the waist, burying his face to his knees and scrunching his eyes shut. His tears leaked damp patches into his sweatpants.

He could never hope to block the sound out though. The volume cranked up with two more crunches and Yuuri whimpered, even as the song skipped, each new flash of music making him wince.

A flash of opera cut through the J-pop.

Yuuri’s eyes popped wide.

A quiet bark broke through from the next room and he heard the scratch of Makachin’s claws against the floorboards, attacking the phone with new vigour now the music was playing on, Italian notes echoing loudly through the apartment. Yuuri launched himself to his feet before he could help it.

He swung round into the next room with his heart in his mouth, honing in on the battered device in the middle of the floor. Makkachin pounced, muffling the music with her fur.

Yuuri still heard the unmistakable tune of Stammi Vicino though, heart fighting with his ribcage. He had an idea.

 

* * *

 

 

**_Zero days to go…_ **

A steady smile was on Victor’s face at the altar but Yuuri could feel his husband-to-be’s fingers trembling slightly, gripping his hand tight like he would fade into thin air if he dared let go. It was endearing. For the great Victor Nikiforov – as confident as he always was on the ice – to still be a heartfelt wreck when it came to Yuuri… warmth flooded through his chest at the thought and he sighed out happily.

Victor’s vows still echoed in his ears, eyes traitorously wet as he held Victor’s gaze. Leaving those pages of Cyrillic a mystery had been worth it. 

Yuuri’s heart had thudded along with every syllable like it was his lifeline, blinking a little quicker to hold back the unexpected hot prick behind his eyes. He swallowed hard, a solid lump of emotion lodged in his throat. He’d waited so long for Victor to say those words to him, dreamt of it since he was a teenager, not even daring to think it might ever become a reality. He pinched himself between Victor's fingers - no, not a dream. This was really real.

God, he loved Victor.

Only now it was his turn.

The thought sobered him, smile slipping from his face a little as he jolted back to reality. The weight of the room’s eyes burned into the side of his face. His cheeks were pink.

He’d memorized his vows perfectly, but now - under the heat of so many eyes watching him - the words just vanished. His heart skipped a beat. How was he going to marry Victor if he couldn’t remember his vows? His eyes went wide with horror.

Victor chuckled. Yuuri just stared at him - did he find it funny?

Then he actually  _ looked _ at the Russian. His lips were curling silently around words, mouthing them to him slowly:  _ I, Yuuri Katsuki, take you… _

Yuuri repeated them out loud, tongue numb like somebody else was moving it for him. His voice sounded muffled. Had he always sounded like that? The nerves were tightening his bow tie around his neck again.

Those few prompting words from Victor suddenly brought the rest of his vows flooding back to him though, rolling instinctively off his tongue. “...take you, Victor Nikiforov, to be my lawfully wedded husband,” Yuuri went on unaided, voice steadier, “to have and to hold from this day forward, for better for worse, for richer for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish until death us do part.”

It sounded rushed and garbled. Air zoomed back into his lungs as soon as the last word left him. Had he forgotten to breathe?  _ Yes _ , Yuuri realised, slowing the sudden rush of oxygen. It wouldn’t be the first time being with Victor had taken his breath away.

The way Victor beamed at him though, Yuuri’s nerve-wracked vows could have been the most wonderful thing the Russian had ever heard.

They’d decided on a combination of vows right at the last moment, Victor unable to resist the romantic traditional vows for his fairytale wedding. They were beautiful. Wonderful. Perfect. All the things Yuuri had dreamed of saying as a lovestruck teenager, dreaming of Victor Nikiforov while staring longingly at the posters smiling down at him from his bedroom walls.

Yuuri breathed a relieved smile, his dream coming true.

But he wasn’t done yet.

“I vow to stay close to you.” He went on, forcing his voice to steady. He watched Victor’s expression carefully. Would he understand? Would he catch on? Yuuri hoped he would. “I vow never to go away. I vow you’ll never have to be afraid of losing me.”

Victor’s eyes popped wide.

_ So he did understand _ , Yuuri thought to himself with a small wave of triumph, watching it sink into the emotion morphing over Victor’s face.

“Our heartbeats will blend together.” Yuuri smiled, heart swelling gloriously in his chest. Victor’s fingers tightened around his. He wondered how he ever could have doubted Victor recognising the vows; Victor knew Stammi Vicino in every detail, especially its English translation and a slight play on words. Yuuri would vow the rest of his life to Victor with the lyrics that had sung to his heart all that time ago, that had called Victor to him across the seas and started their whirlwind romance.

A shuddering breath sighed out of Victor’s lips, eyes wet and glistening. His call had been answered, his loneliness replaced with something stronger. Yuuri would make sure he never forgot it for as long as they both lived.

“Let’s leave together.” 

His fingers curled tighter around Victor’s, shivers of pleasure running up his spine as Victor’s thumb grazed lovingly over his knuckles. Yuuri choked with emotion, feeling his own eyes start to well with traitorous tears to match Victor’s. 

They’d come so far together, but it was only the beginning. They would have the rest of their lives together, the start of a new wonderful adventure. Yuuri sighed, heart swelling as he let the last of his self conscious walls crumble away. He’d spent so much of his life fighting with himself, with what he could do, what he should do, what he deserved. With Victor, he didn’t have to fight anymore. Victor offered everything unreservedly, patiently waiting until Yuuri was ready. Yuuri wanted to give back now, meet Victor in his vulnerability the way Victor had met him in his. Victor would never have to be alone again.

Yuuri met his fiancee’s glittering crystal gaze, never more sure of anything else in his whole life. “I’m ready now.” 

**Author's Note:**

> Yuuri's vows loosely affirming the Stammi Vicino lyrics:  
> "Stay close to me, don’t go away  
> I’m afraid of losing you  
> ...  
> And our heartbeats  
> Are blending together  
> Let's leave together  
> I'm ready now"
> 
> Keep tabs on my tumblr [here](https://justrae2010.tumblr.com/) and check out my other YOI fics [here](http://archiveofourown.org/users/justrae2010/pseuds/justrae2010)
> 
> Please drop a comment before you go !
> 
> Hope you liked it!


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